What is Toxic Relationship?

Any relationship can be toxic, whether for family, work or love through behaviors, words, and attitudes that degrade the mind to the point of causing suffering in life and mental and physical damage. What types of toxic relationship are there? What must we do to escape from a toxic relationship, whether toxic partner or toxic friend? How to fix a toxic relationships? Let's find out.

• What is toxic relationship?
• Signs of toxic relationship
• How to avoid toxic relationship
• How to prepare to deal with toxic people

What is toxic relationship?

Toxic relationship is a relationship which has negative effects on our mental, emotional, or physical health. Toxic relationships can happen in any situation: toxic partner, toxic friend, toxic family or toxic co-worker. Warning signs of a toxic relationship include:

• Being controlled or taken advantage of;
• Being criticized or looked down upon;
• Being abused, both physically and mentally;
• Someone makes you feel worthless or incompetent;
• Someone makes you feel alone or abandoned.

Toxic relationships can affect us in many ways, such as:

• Feeling bad about yourself and feeling worthless and inferior;
• Stress, anxiety and depression;
• Physical health problems, such as headaches, stomach pain and insomnia;
• Other relationship problems, such as arguments and separation;
• If you find yourself in a toxic relationship, you should find a way out of that relationship. Both of you may talk to find a solution, or you may ask for help from people around you or from a mental health professional.

Toxic relationships are the opposite of healthy relationships which are supportive relationships. Once you have a healthy relationship, compromises could be made and you could forgive each other eventually. Even though you both disagree on some matters, you would take the effort to understand each other and try to communicate. A healthy relationship is a comfort and safe zone and is the foundation for a lasting and stable relationship.

Signs of toxic relationship

As mentioned, there are many signs of a toxic relationship. These signs can vary depending on the type of relationship you have, such as a relationship with your partner, friends, family members, or co-workers. The signs of toxic relationship are as follows:

• Lacking of support, not feeling supported and realizing that the person is no longer a safe zone;
• Sarcastic conversation;
• Excessive jealousy even with small things;
• Being controlled, oppressed, forced and abused;
• Revenge, not letting things in the past go ;
• Dishonesty, lying, not telling the truth because of being afraid of the consequences;
• Neglect or inattention;
• Frequent conflicts over finances;
• Accumulated stress from the relationship;
• Your needs are being ignored;
• Losing other relationships, such as friends or family, over the person;
• Lacking self-love ;
• Holding on to the hope that things would be the same, as good as before;
• Being too mindful about what to say or what to do so much that you can't be yourself.

How to avoid toxic relationship

As you can't fix others, you have to adjust yourself or avoid the toxic relationship. You can try applying the following tips in your daily life:

• Always monitor your own behaviors. When you accidentally have a toxic behavior whether through your attitude or an action, you should understand yourself and be aware of the impacts it may have on people around you. Regularly reviewing your own behavior can make you more mindful.
• Training yourself to have empathy will help you understand the feelings and perspectives of others in a more positive way.
• Developing emotional intelligence helps relieve stress, and emotional intelligence helps to control emotions better, including reducing toxic behaviors.
• Respect others’ boundaries. You need to understand when to say no, when to take personal time and when to avoid things. Be mindful about aggressive behaviors that may lead to dissatisfaction in the relationship.
• Seek advice from a psychologist or psychiatrist if needed. Sometimes, the roots of toxic behavior from past trauma or unsolved problems may be buried deep for a long time, so it would be better to seek help from a professional.

How to prepare to deal with toxic people

Toxic people are like chemicals. If you stay with them for a long time, your body will receive those toxins degrading your mental health and the relationships. Therefore, we need to prepare to deal with the behaviors of these people to avoid the toxic relationship.

1. Keep your distance from those who are toxic.

If you know that the person, whether they are a co-worker, close friend or a family member, is toxic to you, you should avoid meeting with them if you can. In case you need to keep contact with them, you may try using a communication tool instead of face-to-face meeting.

2. Control our own emotions.

When the root problem cannot be solved, try working on yourself instead. Calm yourself down by controlling your breathing, then steadily relaxing your mood.

3. Provide an opportunity to express opinions.

Let them finish talking and don't interrupt them from expressing their opinions. Sometimes, we may not like something they said in the past and you remembered them as a toxic person, so try giving them a chance. When they finish talking, you can ask them for more information.

4. Do not force or try to change what happened.

Sometimes, you have to look back at yourself whether you cause the toxicity. For example, your co-worker is stressed about work and under pressure from their supervisor and you talk him into doing things to relax the stress, but your good intentions may turn into a compulsion, causing them to exhibit toxic behavior.

5. Don't be misled by toxicity.

If you are exposed to toxic behaviors, there is no need to behave toxically to them in return. Being aware of your own feelings, thoughts, and behaviors can help you avoid becoming toxic yourself. If you start to have negative feelings, please keep in mind that, once you hurt someone, they will not forget about your behaviors.

Finally, liberation from toxic relationship starts with ourselves. Monitor your behaviors and attitudes to see if they are the beginning of toxicity or whether we are living with toxic people that are not good for your mental health. Try to pull yourself away from the negative energy and fulfil yourself with positive energy instead. If we accumulate too much of toxicity, it only makes us more stressed and may result in the risk of these critical illnesses.

• Stomach ulcer disease: Stress causes the stomach to release a lot of gastric juice which causes irritation to the stomach lining. Chronic inflammation could occurs and lead to the development of stomach ulcers.
• Heart disease and high blood pressure: Stress causes blood vessels throughout the body to constrict, causing organs to not receive enough blood. If it happens to the heart, it could cause the heart muscle to die, becoming heart disease. Once the arteries are severely constricted, it will cause high blood pressure.
• Diabetes: If the fatty acids which are stimulated to release pass through the liver, the liver changes fat into sugar, causing blood sugar to rise. Therefore, people who are stressed a lot could develop diabetes.
• Cancer: It has been observed that people who are stressed often become ill easily, such as colds, sore throats, and mouth ulcers. When their immunity decreases, hormones from the stress could cause abnormal cells which could eventually grow into a cancerous tumor.
  

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Sources: Data retrieved on 10/01/2024

🔖 ThaiHealth (data as of 28/06/2023)

🔖 Thairath (data as of 06/12/2022)

🔖 thestandard (data as of 24/06/2023)

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